Here’s the gist.
I was in uni with a friend. We were
studying having yet another break in the canteen, when I saw him.
Me: “Omg” I said to my friend. “That’s the guy who gave us that presentation two weeks ago”
Friend: “The one you wouldn’t shut up about?”
Me: “Exactly! He is so cute, should I do something?”
Now before you vomit profusely after reading the entry from a diary of a 12 year old, hear me out. I do in fact have a mature thought at the end of this post. Or at least I told myself it’s mature…
Now, in your basic chick-flick, this is how this scenario would unfold:
Friend: “Guuuurl, you should totally go talk to him!”
Me: “But what would I say???”
Friend: “Just flick your hair and laugh at everything he says lol”
Then I would go up to him and say some awkward/charming/punch-me-in-the-face line. Probably will knock something off his table too. Since he is shy and awkward himself, he would be amused by the creature that is I, but would still appreciate my authenticity and see me as his potential mate. We would quit school, get married and have thousands of babies, the end. Right? Or did I just watch one too many Hillary Duff movies? Did I also mention that in this movie I have bangs and they surprisingly suit me?
Reality is cruel.
What would I really say in real life? Chances of me being awkward are still pretty high, but chances of him finding it adorable are close to zero. I’m not exactly a want-to-put-her-in-my-pocket kind a girl. Plus there are people around him, plus he’s wearing earphones, plus it’s exams week, so he’s probably busy, plus that and that and that. So many complications, so few balls.
Really, how do people strike up conversations out of the blue? What do they say? How? How can Zooey rock bangs like no one else? Long story short, I did research.
After a solid hour of educating myself on “How to talk to strangers”, I decided to challenge myself. Since I swore off online dating, I guess it’s time to turn to the way humans used to meet ages ago…
I’M GONNA CLUB A GUY AND TAKE HIM TO MY CAVE!
Okay, maybe I shouldn’t learn from cave women… just a thought.
Anyway, the challenge will entail me striking up conversations with strangers whenever the situation presents itself. I wanted to make it more measurable, say “a stranger a day”. But then I decided not to kid myself. I mean, you can quit sugar cold turkey for example, but becoming smooth as Barney Stinson in one day is just not humanly possible. Even for NPH himself.
So yeah. I will try to personally test exactly how broken our society really is or rather how socially awkward I really am. Most probably 90% of my target audience will think I’m some sort of time-traveler from the 80’s with my ancient chatter techniques… but we’ll see. I’m excited to try. (You see the strategically placed “target audience”? Making sure my marketing degree is bearing fruit already)
AND I will be blogging about each awkward interaction I had, so that you can laugh at them just as much as I will cringe. So yeah, if you made it this far, I hope you don’t think I’m twelve. Then again, I didn’t quite make a strong argument to prove the contrary. Oh well.
Let the awkwardness commence!